apoyando (supporting)
snapshots from Chile
I was invited to interview a mental health support group, made up primarily of city-dwelling women who are or were formerly caregivers. A mental health social worker, for a state agency, facilitates their meetings every Friday in her office. Always over tea and cookies.
On whose responsibility it is to find the most lonely older adults, and connect them to groups like this:
Our loneliness, or our depression, we hide it. But those who are in their houses, like you say, [to connect them] is our job, at best. To go and get to know these people, and incentivize them and bring them along.
[Another woman adding:] We have to go to them. Because they are never going to look for it.
We had quite a debate. Members of the group go back and forth about whether there is, indeed, increasing attention paid to older Chileans given the current divide in generation. And, further, if it is the support that older adults really need to address loneliness:
There is a very large generational divide in this moment. We were raised to have much respect, much value, for older people. My grandparents sat down with us and told us stories of their lives. Of the 14 grandkids I have, two ask me for stories from my life.
[A woman disagreeing:] Here in this country, they’ve become more conscious of older adults. Because now we are not so vulnerable. Myself, us now, we’ve been given the opportunity to share [in this support group]. [Another woman adding:] Which our parents did not have. Healthcare, [older adult] homes. Now, indeed they are concerned with older adults.
[First speaker reenters conversation:] Benefits, yes, we’ve got those. We have support. But that doesn’t mean we’re not alone.
[Another woman affirming:] That doesn’t get rid of loneliness.
[First speaker resumes:] Because you can be surrounded by people and feel alone. We have four days [of the month meeting together as a group]. But what happens with the rest [of the month]? We have 26 days.
[Man, affirming:] The vast majority, we spend alone.